Mama Bear

I don't mean to sound totally snotty here, but I am not used to anyone being mean to my kid or not liking my kid. He's a fun, nice, happy, likable person. Kids of all ages tend to enjoy Connor's company and he's always played so well in various social situations. Adults think he's awesome. My "mama bear" hasn't really had to come out in defense of my son.

Then today, we decided to stop at the playground on our way home from the library. One of my pet peeves is big kids playing in what is designated for little kids. This play area was filled with kids well over 10 years old, there were at least a half dozen of them bounding all over the toddler slides. Grrr...

Connor tried to play but kept getting knocked aside. I bit my lip and glared at the kids from behind my sunglasses. I hate never knowing when to step in and when to let Connor figure things out on his own. Grrr.grrr..

Eventually Connor must have decide that if you can't beat 'em, join 'em. He walked over to where a group of big kids were sitting in the sand, playing with something I couldn't see. He squatted near them and just looked at what they were doing and an older girl told him "Go away!" and actually HIT him on the arm.

Connor looked shocked. No one had ever done anything like that to him before. I went right over to that girl and told her you do NOT HIT. Hitting is not nice! And took Connor away from her. She just looked at me with this evil grin.

I know kids are mean and kids aren't perfect but that was just sad for us. Mama Bear was out and roaring.

I'm still not certain I handled it well. Connor started to cry, and as is his way, he told me what happened with a lot of drama. "She said go away Mommy!".  He looked so offended, so heart broken at being treated that way even though he didn't do anything wrong. So, I said loud enough for the girl to hear "Some kids are just mean. That little girl was not nice at all."

I then suggested we go home and play with our neighbors who are nice and are his friends. Should we have stayed and toughed it out? Played elsewhere? There were surprisingly no other little kids there, no one else I could have pointed out as a potential playmate.

Should I have told that girl off a little more? Found her mother and complained?

I was beyond annoyed at that point because the entire play area was filled with romping big kids and the few benches filled with their yakking mothers. No one noticed or cared about the "incident". No big deal to lots of parents, I'd guess. Kids fight all the time.

I was steaming mad and Connor was crestfallen and still sniffling sadly. I just had to say once more, loudly, that we were not going to stay and play with a bunch of mean kids. Then we left, me in a huff. Mature I know.

Normally, Connor lets things roll off his back. He falls down, he gets a kiss, he gets up and moves on. He's used to everyone being nice and loving him. His first real encounter of animosity and meanness really hurt. I told him he was a good boy, he didn't do anything wrong, some kids are just mean, that girl's mommy wasn't around to make sure she behaved, etc. Still...he seemed so subdued after that. Contemplative, wounded. A mean remark and physical assault seemed to extinguish his little spark.


It made me so mad. GRRRRR!