Step 1: change the 8 month old's diaper. Try not to get peed on, wrangle squirming child into diaper, rearrange diaper to fix uncomfortable baby wedgie. Grab baby, drag back over to changing area (admire cute tushy).
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ignore sad, neglected foot who has not had pedicure in ages |
Step 2: wrangle baby into cute denim shorts. Make several attempts at buttoning and zipping up shorts while baby clings to dress and tries to stick head inside. Try to locate baby's shirt while baby finds comb and proceeds not to comb own hair, but to eat comb instead.
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| Admire cuteness; pose puppy nearby. (Puppy looks like it wants the comb!) |
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| Laugh at self for even imagining baby will lie still for puppy comparison photo |
Step 3: Comb baby's hair while making sure baby doesn't fall down, while looking for baby's shirt, while answering the phone, while shooing cats away from baby's dirty diaper still laying nearby.
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| Admire cute tushy |
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Note short legs, note jean shorts actually look like capri pants yet baby still super cute and stylish |
Step 4: Find shirt! Wrangle shirt onto baby, curse baby shirt makers for designing clothes with more than one button. Hug crying baby, wonder why getting dressed is so traumatizing.
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| How dare you torture me so! |
Step 5: Persuade baby's daddy to stop playing a video game and help pose baby on couch. Proceed to make any crazy face and funny noises to keep baby sitting and make him smile. Thankful Daddy is good at this.
Step 6: Finally done! Release baby onto play mat with pile of toys. Lay down on floor; check clock to see if it's nap time yet. Notice top is covered with this morning's avocado, some spit up and also realize forgot to brush teeth today. Call Grandma to arrange for babysitting tonight! :)
Now, I really should brush my teeth before we go out tonight!
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